Kahaani !!

Ek kahaani hai jo aaj sabko sunani hai .
Pyaar ke sahare jo chali vo humari zindagani hai .
Kal mein Jo khushiyaan aayi thi unke peeche ki vajah aaj sabko batani hai ..
Isse galti na kehna vo ladakpan ki ek naadani hai ..

To kissa kuch Yu shuru hua ek roz vo ajnabee humse aakar mila. Us roz vo ajnabee sirf ajnabee na raha , us mulakat ke darmiyaan hume usse pyaar ho chala .. mulakat besak kuch pal bhar ki thi par pyaar mera umar bhar ka tha ..

Zindagi ne bhi humse majak kia , us ajnabee ko bhi humse pyaar ho gaya … mulakatein hui , ikraar hua , saath jeene marne ka bhi izhaar hua …

Khushiyaan aayi , rang khile, hum bevajah bhi ab hasne lage , or khush bhi kyu na ho? vajah mili thi hume muskurane ki , kasam khayi thi kisi ne zindagi bhar humara saath nibhane ki ..

Hume koi mila tha jisne humse humari kamiyoon ke saath pyaar kia tha , hume koi mila tha jisne hume paraya hokar apno se bhi jyada Apna mana tha , hume koi mila tha jisne bina soche samjhe humari khushiyoon ke liye sab kuch kia tha .

Haan ” tha” ,ab waqt ki najakat ko deekheye ga , Ek khel usne bhi humare saath khela , pyaar beshak bepanaah tha par waqt ke aage uska zor na chala . Kasme khayi thi jo zindagi bhar saath rehne ki , shayad un kasmo mein zindagi sirf kuch saalo ki hi thi .. log waqt ko badalte deekhte hai , humne us waqt mein insaan ko badalte deekha hai . Humne deekha hai pyaar ko badalte hue , ehsaaso ko badalte hue , or aakhirkaar khud ko badalte hue .

Din , mahine or saal badle, zindagi badli , insaan badle par us ajnabee ke liye pyaar na badla . Ek umeed thi vo ayega , kuch majbooriyaan thi uski Jo hume samjhayega. Pyaar abhi bhi hai usko ye maankar baithi thi mein , vo kahe ya na kahe mein uski hu or vo sirf mera ye jaan kar baithi thi mein …

Ek roz ye intezaar bhi khatam hua , vo aaya , aisa laga sang apne vo hazar khushiyaan laya … par har kahaani ka antt khushiyoon bhara nahi hota , pyaar ke badle apko pyaar mile ye zaruri nahi hota … Jo aaya tha ab vo ek alag insaan tha , jisse humne pyaar kia vo uski tarah bilkul na tha … waqt ka khel kahe ya haseen nadani par is dafa uske dil mein humare liye bilkul pyaar na tha .. khilona the ab hum uske liye jisse usne bas Apna mann behlane ke liye rakha tha ..

Haan bura laga tha thoda par galti uski bhi nahi , dur tha humse , isliye shayad najdiki badh gayi ho kisi or se kabhi . Sab waqt ka khel hai kal jiske liye hum uska sab kuch the aaj deekho kuch bhi nahi hai , kal jiske liye hum uski zindagi the aaj deekho uski khushiyoon ki vajah bhi nahi hai ..

Par ab jab waqt ne itne sitam kiye hai to ek or sahi , nafrat nahi hai tujhse par ab bas pyaar nahi …

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This too shall pass !!

Your past is one thing you can’t change , this took me quite a long to understand .

I was worried about things I’ve no control over , I was being hopeful about things I should have get over years back . I did things i think was right back then but life isn’t that easy , it fucks you every now and then .

” Bothering yourself about your mistakes , alienating yourself from your loved ones , treating yourself as if you are piece of shit , thinking nothings gonna get normal for you , crying yourself to sleep every night , throwing people away from your life ” all this was a big mistake, I once committed so I don’t want my people to commit it again …

You are nothing like your ex thinks you are, you are much more than that, much more beautiful , much more understanding , you are a magic . Don’t let that shine fade away because someone thinks you are not worth loving . Infact he was not worthy enough to keep you .

You are nothing like this society thinks you are , you are not a wannabe , your are not like others , you make your own way and work pretty hard for it .

You are not what your school or college degree shows you are, you are much more than that , you know things that others can’t even understand , all this bullshit you are going through doesn’t define you , the way you are fighting it , your personality , the way you are working your ass off for owning your dream car defines you .

You are not what those people think you are , you are sweet and caring , you’ve helped people selflessly , you’ve even cried for the ones who never mattered for you . You’ve been there for everyone and never asked anything in return . Those assholes thinks you are rude , arrogant , shallow and what not , little do they know it’s just a mask you put on to save yourself from people like them . They don’t know you are fragile ,you get disappointed easily . You are not always strong enough to keep up with their shallow mentality .

So just take a deep breathe and relax , because this too shall pass 💙

Broken

I think I’ve loved you enough to even let you go .

baby I am sorry but ….

I can’t take it anymore as you can see I am already broken and beyond repairs now 💔

A note for you 💌

So here’s a thing about priority, it indeed change . Yours and mine changed too , you made it to the top of mine and I,  I to the bottom of yours , funny right !!

It’s not your fault , you were quite young figuring out your messed up life  , getting closer to this fascinating world , taking steps closer towards your dreams , and yeah you had choices , so you bumped into those that seemed beautiful but not complicated and ours ,  was forever a “complicated bond” . Walking beside someone who is impatient , insecure and an emotional asshole is pretty tough , I got it . Nobody wants complication in their life , so leaving me was never your fault . You were just trying to manage your life , trying to unburden it.

Your priorities changed and you happened cut the one from the list who loved you more than anything . Not a big deal right ? Who wants love these days , that’s a complicated shit ! And moreover you got plenty of birds in the sky , so why to bother yourself for one shitty girl .

Don’t you worry I don’t blame you for anything . You were never mine to have , you just happened to be the most beautiful phase of my life . I loved you , I saw my whole damn world in you as if you were the only thing that ever mattered to me . Loving you was never a regret , I don’t regret anything that I shared with you , not even a bit . You added some beautiful chapters to my ” not-so-beautiful-life” .

But yeah , love is a deep shit , and it hurts.  So going away from you was painful and somewhere it still is , but somehow I managed to get through it now like you did back then . You were strong , you did not let this shit affect you and why would you ? You got other problems to deal with besides love . I’ve learnt a lot from you but what I failed to learn was,  how to “unlove” someone , how to leave someone after promising them “forever” , how to get over those uncountable  “memories” that haunts you at night and yeah how to cut down someone you once loved from the list of your “priority” .

No no , nothing that you do affects me now , nothing that you say breaks my soul now , I am not a stupid ,over emotional asshole that I used to be , “now” .

Thank you for the “love” and the “lessons” !!

With love :
A girl you once loved 💌

Kuch Sach ,kuch sapna hai tu !!

Maut se rubaru hokar , zindagi ki ehmiyat maloom hui .
Khud ke liye jab aaj ye aasu aaye , to khud se hi pehchan hui .
Kya hai  zindagi or kya is zindagi m apno ka saath ,do pal ki hai zindagi or us mein bhi bas ek lamha hi to hai apne paas  …

“Vo kissa tha usse kissa hi rehne de , agar hissa bana lia usse to ye zindagi fir bikhar jayegi , or fr roz tujhe rulaegi”
Uske liye tu baut roo liya , ab zara khud ke liye bhi to muskura,  ae zindagi ab tu thoda theher jaa.

Aaj ek arse baad khud pe pyaar aaya hai , in palo ko kuch peher dil se lagane de , aaj in aankhon se kuch aansu khushi ke bhi beh jaane de ..
Dard baut saha hai is zindagi mein , ab thoda tasalli se mujhe muskurane de , Jin yaadoon ke sahare jee raha tha un yaadoon ko ab in fiza mein ghulkar kahi dur Jane de ..

Haan pata hai zindagi vaisi nahi chali jaisa tune chaha tha , tu uske saath nahi reh paya jiske saath tune socha tha , haan pata hai raatein sone nahi deti tujhe , subah ka ujala bhi aankhon mein kabhi kabhi ab chubne lagta hai tujhe , pata hai tu pareshan hai , iss kabhi na rukne vali zindagi mein tu bas ek haara hua insaan hai ..
Par sapne abhi bhi to zinda hai na tere , vo aasani se marne nahi denge tujhe . Chal ab sambhal ja , unhi sapno ke khaatir ab tu jeena seekh ja . Haan maana galtiyaan hui hai tujhse , par ab kya unka shook zindagi bhar manaega ? Apne andar ke insaan ko kya jeete je maarna chahaega?  Insaan hi to hai tu koi bhagwan nahi Jo har paap ka bhagidaar tu sirf khud ko banaega. ..

Use ek haseen sapna ban bhool jaa , kuch mulakaaton ke darmiyaan un yaadoon ko dafna jaa.
Chal ab ek nayi shuruwat kar , kisi paraye se nahi ab khud se pyaar kar …

Jab dard ne dard se mulakat kari !!

Kal raat dard ne dard se mulakat kari , ek tute hue dil ne dusre tute hue dil se baat kari .

Baatein hui , kuch raaz khule , do ajnabee ab humraaz ban chale . Ek alag si kashish thi usme , meri adhuri kahani ki bhumika buni fir usne .

Kal raat dard ne dard se mulakat kari , ek tute hue dil ne dusre tute hue dil se baat kari .

Jo beet gayi vo baatein hui , jo hasrate kabhi kisi se na kahi gayi vo bhi baya hui. Ek adhure ,bikhre hue ehsaaso ki dor hume badhne lagi jiski neev humne mulakaato pe rakhi .

Kal raat dard ne dard se mulakat kari , ek tute hue dil ne dusre tute hue dil se baat kari .

Puri raat ye silsila chala , humne apna dard ek dusre ke samne bekhof baya kia . Or fr subah hui , vo parinda apne sheher ki aur udh chala or mujhe usne frse paraya kar dia.

Kal raat dard ne dard se mulakat kari , ek tute hue dil ne dusre tute hue dil se baat kari .

Someone who’s still my forever !!

So here I go again , writing about you .

No I am not sad , neither do I wanna talk to you but just sitting at a corner of my room and reminiscing about the time that was magical . Strange right ? After all this time , after what happened between both of us , you’re still on my mind . Its not just this moment , you happened to cross my mind quite often . No it’s not your fault , I know you are happy out there , living your “perfect” life in this not-so-perfect world . Living all those moments you always wanted to live and those dreams you used to tell me about .. I am happy for you like for real . I really don’t blame you for anything that happened between both of us or is happening with me . You just wanted to live your dream life and I just couldn’t make it to your “dream life” ,yeah I was hurt for a while but now I am all fine … I just hope you are happy out there because there’s still a part of me that wants to see you happy .

You know what’s the most funniest part that there’s something in me that still loves you . After all those chances that I gave to myself to move on or to get over you I still feel the same connection with you … I am still bounded to all those memories that once you gave me and those are the best memories of my life till date .. life is unfair man, it really is. I wanted you to be my forever but yet we parted our ways .And now when someone asks me to be their “forever” I just couldn’t say yes … This was something I imagined with you so how on earth I can imagine it with someone else now….Moving on is tough man , it’s not that I want you back in my life but it’s impossible for me to give someone that place that was once yours …And how can I , it was magic that I experienced with you and I don’t feel it with anyone now …. We might fall for people and make them a part of our lives but not everyone is capable of creating that magic , magic that I call love ..

I am not a part of you now , I am not even a part of your memories anymore . Maybe someone else has taken that place but trust me things like these don’t make me sad anymore .. I really want you to make someone a part of your life because maybe only then I would be able to let you go . Only then I would be able to make someone my forever. Only then I would be able to really love someone . Only then I would be able to feel that magic again but with someone else this time …

You are my “bitter-sweet” memory and my forever ❤

Paheli

Kyu zindagi tu aisi hai , kyu tu har peher ek nayi paheli si hai .

Kyu samajhna tujhe aasan nahi , kyu suljhi hui teri raah nahi .

Kyu tu itne dard deti hai , kyu khushiyon bhare tu sirf kuch hi pal deti hai .

Kyu apno ko tu itna dur kar deti h , kyu parayo ko tu dil ke itne kareeb kar deti hai .

Kyu zindagi tu aisi hai , kyu tu har peher ek nayi paheli si hai .

Har kissa yaha zindagi mein alag mod le aata hai , jis raah se dur jana chaho sirf ussi raah m le jata hai . Khushiyaan bhi ab beimani lagne lagti hai , dard mein hi jeekar ab ek alag si tasalli milti hai .

Kuch pal aise bhi hote hai jaha pyaar ki zarurat lagne lagti hai , or kuch paloo mein sirf ek us anjaan ajnabi ki kami khalne lagti hai . Kisi ke zindagi bhar ka saath kabhi apna sa nahi lagta or kisi ke kuch pal ka saath bhi zindagi bhar ka apnapan de jata hai .

Kyu zindagi tu aisi hai , kyu tu har peher ek nayi paheli si hai .

Are you afraid of falling in love ? 

To be honest ,I am not at all afraid of falling in love . I wanna fall in love , wanna love someone whole heartedly.


Love knows no limits and that’s the kind of love I crave for , no boundaries,  no limits,  only love and passion . Love for the person and passion for the love ….

Love is not just an emotion it’s beyond that . Have you ever encountered a human who have the capability to alter your do’s into dont’s and dont’s into do’s. The kind of person who  drives you crazy just by simply looking at you . The kind of person who makes you crave for love at 2 in the morning and at 6 in the evening. The kind of person who you wanna kiss for the rest of your life ,the kind of person who you wanna annoy till the end of your days .
Don’t know about happy endings (life isn’t a fairytale right!!) But want to live a happy life with him , want to make this life a better place to live in with him ….

Love for sure is a game , where you don’t fight against each other but you fight for each other , you fight for each other’s presence , for each other’s goodwill,  you fight for making each other a better human being , you fight for each other’s happiness…and if you don’t do that , you don’t go by the rules then you loose and loose yourself too ..

But there are things  I am scared of , I am scared of falling for the wrong person , giving all of me to someone who don’t even understand love , who don’t wanna fight for me but for himself only . Who don’t believe in forevers. I am scared of falling in love with someone who is going to make me a part of his 24 hours insta story but not a part of his family frame. Who is going to make me a part of his friend circle but don’t consider me as his life partner ….

I’ve heard people saying , love can destroy you .Not at all , It’s the most wonderful feeling one can ever experience , it’s our expectations that destroys us , it’s our blind belief for the wrong people that destroys us , it’s our failed relationships that destroys us , it’s the people that destroys us but not love . If it’s love it can never destroy you infact it’ll make you , it’ll make you a better human , a better person . It builds you not destroys you !!
And for this reason we all are afraid of falling in love , it’s not love that we are afraid of , it’s the people !!!

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